Monday, April 13, 2009

Deep Reflections, Courtesy of the IRS

Other women have written that they sat at the dinner table and thought, “We’re not all here. There’s someone missing.” They know that they are meant to have another child.

I have always wanted only two children, just like my own family as a child. I have one sister, and with my parents, we were a happy foursome. As my husband and I juggle preschooler, baby, work, and the occasional attempt at exercise, we realize from a practical point of view, managing two is about as much as we can do.

Still, when I snuggle with the no-longer-so-small baby and think that I will never nurse a newborn again, that I’ll never again hold such a tiny being, fresh to the world, it aches a little.

Last month, I fired up Turbo Tax, imported last year’s data and then added a line for the baby. I felt unaccountably proud of the two children, tidily typed into the system. As I looked fondly at all four of us on that most unromantic, mundane, bureaucratic of forms, I recognized that we are a complete family. We’re all here.

9 comments:

Amber said...

As much as part of me yearns for another one, there's a certain freedom that comes with being finished. And, really, the world is built for families of 4. I think we're done too, and I also feel sort of proud of this family we've created.

Bea said...

I feel exactly the same way.

Laura said...

That's very sweet!

Mayberry said...

It's nice when a feeling of contentment comes from doing your taxes!

Asianmommy said...

It's nice to feel complete. :)

Damselfly said...

That's sweet! I think my second baby here will probably be the last. I think I'm getting to old to be pregnant! ;)

Waltzing with Widgets said...

Just finished taxes tonight. Two different programs for personal tax & nanny payroll don't communicate, result: underwitholding penalty. Fortunately, our little baby is everything the IRS is not!

Kimberly said...

That's so sweet. And the fact that you can find such beauty in your taxes is amazing to me. Very cool.

kittenpie said...

I have to say that much as I'm not a baby person on the whole, there are times now when I notice something that I will miss. Like today, when cradling my babe to me and feeling his warmth and the softness of his hair against my cheek made me think that I should tuck that away for later. For some reason, at that moment, he didn't feel so damn heavy.