Thursday, December 18, 2008

Sure Signs that I Need More Sleep

After Buster’s birth, I bought a pair of jeans that were two sizes bigger than normal, and they’ve been jarringly baggy for the last two months, in a gangsta-risking-showing-the-underwear sort of way. I’m not quite in shape to wear my old jeans for longer than a few minutes (but I can get in them now!), and I refuse to buy a pair in the in-between size, since my goal is within sight. That’s left me pulling up my pants again and again.

Then last week, I had the revelation that I could wear a belt to hold them up. The idea! Of using a belt for its true purpose – threading through the belt loops on the pants. Amazing.

Honestly, I think it’s the first time I’ve ever worn a belt for non-cosmetic purposes. In fact, the reason why I didn’t think of it is that when I last wore a belt, probably in 2005, I was the last person on earth to have moved on to the ‘long shirt worn untucked over beltless low-waisted pants’ look. Belts seem to be intermittently back now, but I have insufficient fashion sense to judge when to wear one, leaving me to the mercy of having a belt a purely functional purpose. After three weeks of hiking up the jeans, boy, is it more comfortable.

Next in the brilliant thought department:

I’ve had a low-level irritation with the number of knives it takes to prepare a bagel. One serrated knife to slice it in half, and then a butter knife to take care of the margarine, or whatever “buttery spread” material we’re using these days. The butter knife is no good at piercing the bagel, and the serrated knife makes a mess of the butter. The result is a plate and two knives to wash, every time I want to have a bagel.

Then it occurred to me that the one item we never use in the excellent knife block we received for Christmas three years ago from SwingDaddy’s parents looks like this:

Serrated on one side, smooth and appropriate for butter on the other. What genius.

Better late than never.

5 comments:

kittenpie said...

I am right with you on the pants. I have a few pairs that are a size too big and a few pairs of stretchy pants that I bought for this postpartum business, but it's frustrating. Still, I refuse to buy more clothes for a time that I hope will be short enough not to merit them. (Instead, shoes!) You could also use suspenders if it were about 1985. ;^)

And who knew there were bagel knives? Live and learn, live and learn.

Mamacita Tina said...

I love multitasking tools!

I am in desperate need of a belt, the kind that goes through the loops. Because I am a serious pear shape, any pants I buy have a serious gap at the waistline letting everyone know what kind of underwear I'm wearing. Ugh.

Mayberry said...

I am still in the in-between pants stage--haven't been able to button real pants for weeks, but not big enough for maternity pants. I have taken to wearing the pants wide open with long shirts covering the fly. So sexy.

Leeanthro said...

I bought a belt recently because though I love the stretch they put in jeans these days, I'm always pulling them back up midday.

Haven't used the belt yet, but the intention is there!

And FYI, I once read that lacerations from cutting bagels is one of the top reasons that people go to the ER for cuts.

Bob said...

We've been using our Guillotine bagel cutter lately, as it cuts the refrigerated bagels really well ( microwave it for 26 sec, real moist). We had not use it for a long time as it does not work well with really soft bagels. But now we've found the way.

http://www.asseenontvguys.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=160